.

I feel sorry for gay prostitutes, work must be a pain in the ass.

When I run I like to go through cow fields, it gets the calves working.

How do Eskimos start flirting? By breaking the ice.

If you're on a date with a girl you should take her to a theme park and go on the log flumes, gets them wet every time.

What do Saddam Hussein and a drunk have in common?
-They both end up hanging.

When my last girlfriend broke up with me I asked her "Is it the sex?", she said, "Yes I'm a lesbian".

I tried creating a fart machine, but it back fired.

Why don't gay people ever win at hide and seek?
- Because they're always in the closet.

What's a terrorist's favourite car?
-Citroen C4.

I used to be a horse jockey, in every race I was more than a head from everybody.

I had a tiny shit the other day, I named it winnie the pooh.